I have been all over the place with this blog, and to be perfectly honest it is feeling like a chore now. I thought I would enjoy it when I had a schedule and writing about my goals from the week however that seems to stifle me. Writing has never really been one of my main focuses in life. I just like the idea of having a little place on the web to voice whatever is on my mind.
I haven’t decided yet if I am keeping this blog or deleting it. I am completing my tasks and goals however having the pressure of writing about them makes me procrastinate from writing about them. I was so eager to begin 1 1/2 years ago but that’s just me, I like to begin new things and to stop when I’m getting bored. This is not the first time I’ve started a blog with good intentions of keeping up with it. One year I decided I wanted to take a photo everyday for a year and blog about it, another time I thought it would be funny to make a new blog about the
funny stupid quotes I say. You can guess how these turned out after a month. I think the only blog I’ve been somewhat consistant with is my Tumblr but I don’t even go on that anymore. (Don’t judge me! I needed a place to feul my teenage angst and fangirl over Lady Gaga!)
Is this goodbye? I might be back with a different blog at some point, however it will have to be when I feel invested in what I am writing about. (Maybe I should write about Lady Gaga)
Looking through my old posts, I feel like this is just regurgitated whinging.
I still don’t know what I want to do with this blog. I made a schedule but I’m not sure I want to partake. Originally, I wanted this blog to be a place where I could easily see all the goals I wanted to achieve for the year. I thought it would be encouraging for accountability too. But accountability it seems, does not motivate me and I
slowly quickly lost interest in writing.
What is the ultimate goal? This same question mirrors my life. I have no clue. I know what I want to do now, but not 5-10 years time. My tastes change far too often. I do envy people who have a set goal and go for it.
Maybe I should stick to the schedule and see what happens? And if it really is becoming a chore, I might have to say goodbye (if I cannæ think of anything to write about).
Well my goals for the next month are to do regular housekeeping (a full clean monthly and light clean weekly), budget for the month (which I’ve already done), blog regularly (LOL), do daily gratitude and to start exercising/being more active (I swear I was a sloth in a previous life).
Not too bad. The worst one is the exercise. I was quite active as a child but then as I got older I just got more sedentary. I think that’s somewhat the same for the majority.
By the way: the schedule I have is a monthly goals post, weekly round-up and a weekly gratitude post which may be illustrated. That’s all the posts I can think of doing right now. We’ll see how this goes!
I have been thinking about which direction I want this blog to go in. I am no longer using it for the intended purpose of following my goals, even though I still want to. I originally had a vision of updating weekly on all of my goals that I am carrying out, I even made all the different categories. But I like creating new things.
Now I have kinda abandoned that vision. So I think I would like this blog to be about anything I want to write about. My goals, the things I like, inspiring posts to help me put my thoughts in perspective and to hopefully help whoever is reading.
I hope you stick around to watch this blog evolve 🙂
It was my birthday a while ago. Since becoming an adult I have gotten into the pattern of getting upset with myself around my birthday because I am always focusing on the things I haven’t achieved being an adult. Most of these things are proper adult things like buying a house, having a car, having a family. In reality, most adults can’t even afford a house until they’re in retirement, cars are freakin’ expensive and I do not want a family anytime soon! (unless they’re the fluffy kind)
I seem to be forgetting that the adult years last for around 30 years. So instead of getting sad this year, I am turning it around and writing down what I have accomplished in my life:
- learned to walk
- learned to talk
- completed school
- was first person of my household to go to uni
- got all gold trophies in Mario Kart
- am the only person in my household with student debt
- am probably not the only person in my household who is in debt
- went to a concert on my own
- went flying on my own
- passed driving theory
- didn’t fail uni/school/college
- made an animation
- knows how to draw in photoshop
- was first person in my household to be on social media (yey millennial generation!)
- have a blog
- won a Pacman teddy from the crane game
- won a Pacman ghost teddy from the crane game (Clyde to be exact, my favourite!)
- is now proud wearer of glasses
- have all Beyoncé albums
- won tickets to see Beyoncé live
- dyed my hair
- has traveled abroad
- been on a rollercoaster
- got through puberty
- finally became a self-employed artist
- got stung by a wasp
- beat the final boss in Ocarina of Time
Yes they might not be BIG accomplishments, but it really is the little things we have to remember. (Plus there are some bigger achievements that I am choosing to not blog about at this time.) Yes I want independence, my own family, but I already have a family and a roof over my head. It’s ok to dream and have goals, but it is even more important to remind ourselves of where we are now, in a positive way. Remind ourselves of what we have instead of what we have not.
Birthday shoob wishes you a happy birthday!
Is realisation spelled with an ‘s’ or a ‘z’? As a UK citizen, I have grown up with British spellings but what does confuse me is when the odd American spelling seeps into the language and I have no idea which one is correct. Even writing this paragraph, the word ‘realisation’ has a red zig-zag line underneath. I did also spell ‘spelled’ as ‘spelt‘ so maybe I am not the best person to be questioning the zig-zag. (It doesn’t even recognize zig-zag as a word!)
This is not the subject of this post though.
I haven’t blogged on here in a hwhile.
To be honest, I kinda fell off track last week. I think I have been putting too much pressure to do too many things. I guess I really don’t benefit from writing down a whole list of things I want to do. I think the pressure was from all the creative goals. From studying a creative degree, and a creative college course before that, and focusing on creative GCSEs, it’s no wonder I wrote down lots of creative goals I wanted to accomplish. But I think all the past education made me believe that I had to be creative all the time. I had to paint/draw/illustrate/craft. I had to publish all my creative projects to the internet. I had to apply for creative jobs. I came to a realisation last week that I don’t really want that. I still have creative projects I want to complete, but I want it to be just a hobby. Something I do once in a while. Because in reality, that is what I do.
I am not the person I was 7 years ago. No one is. This is something that has been bubbling up since uni. I am not that invested anymore.
In other news, it was Haiku day the other day. I wrote a haiku based on what I was grateful for that day. Here goes:
I am grateful for,
hot chocolate even though,
it did not taste good.
I have been having really bad hot chocolates lately. Maybe my taste is changing. Literally and metaphorically.
I still like tea though.
Tea > hot chocolate
P.S. happy belated easter! I received 0 eggs because
I have no friends I eat chocolate all the time and didn’t think easter eggs were a special treat. (yeah I’m going with that excuse). (But it is true! And I am planning to cut down!). My mum did make a massive chocolate cake though so I guess that made up for it.
I did something different last night. Instead of just waiting till I was tired, when the sun went down, I tidied my bedroom. It felt so good to be getting into bed without sharing it with a bunch of clothes. One of the advantages to using battery-operated candles is I could place them in my wardrobe without fear of fire. I also packed away everything that was in my handbag. This is very rare for me. By the time I’d finished, it was about time for bed. I went to bed around 9 but for some reason I could not sleep. I thought I would be sparked out as not only did I exercise yesterday but I also walked through my hilly town for 45 minutes. I thought exercise is meant to tire you out! I didn’t have any dinner last night though as I had a late lunch so maybe that could be it? I woke up at my alarm at 6 (yes even on weekends I want to keep waking up at my alarm. I have changed!), hungry from not having dinner, and strangely awake.
Tonight is the last night of the Lights Out Challenge. I have surprisingly enjoyed it. I thought I would crash and burn as I, like many other people living in this century, cannot live without electronic gadgets. At first, I was really appreciative of how technology has come so far and of how this challenge was the norm for everyone probably not even 100 years ago. Now I feel kind of sad that it’s over. I will definitely incorporate this into my lifestyle. I think I’ll try having a lights out night on Sundays as I have a tendency to stay up late on Sundays and no one wants to start a Monday morning feeling groggy as hell. I’m thinking of doing another full week of this when it’s the height of summer. As the sun doesn’t go down until around half 9 where I live, it will be perfect for transitioning into sleep mode.
I strongly suggest you try this challenge if you want to reset your body clock, or if you want to get into the habit of a better sleep routine. When sunset arrives, NO electronics and NO artificial lights. If you think it will be too hard or boring, you might be surprised.